Abdicate In The Lines

from by Jana Fisher

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    Jewel case CD of A History of Sleepwalking.

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about

Percussion is scissors, zippers, knuckles, and a squeaking chair.

lyrics

So this is what you've been doing
Up late at night staring at the screen
I'd been hoping that we'd stay pure
But I'm feeling too damn insecure
'Cause my skin
Isn't porcelain

It's dotted through with pores and scars
I can't compare to all the porn stars
With their silicone breasts and air-brushed thighs
So I'll pretend my lust is never satisfied
I'll look over your shoulder to see what you like
And pretend to enjoy it so someday I might
You claimed you'd always hoped that I would turn this wild
But I'm just holding on to the dreams of a child

Maybe you'll think I'm pretty
And feel lucky that you have me
If I learn to love you the way she does
'Cause with her all-loving eyes
She will never have to cry
So I'm gonna try
To forget what I was
So I can love you the way that she does

I'll wake before you and get my face done
So that you can forget that I'm a real person
I'll practice my seductive look in the mirror
So maybe you'll draw just a little bit nearer
I'll be your doll
As I stare at the wall
And make believe your affection satisfies
But I can't keep buying into your lies
This smells like love but doesn't last
I'm just an actress who's been cast
In this lust show you just won't give up
But I never will be quite good enough
To make you forget your erotic queen
Who's never more than what she seems

Maybe you'll think I'm pretty
And feel lucky that you have me
If I learn to love you the way she does
'Cause with her all-loving eyes
She will never have to cry
So I'm gonna try
To forget what I was
So I can love you the way that she does

I come to you to tell the truth
Of what made all this come to be
You apologize with hardened eyes
And the guilt weighs just on me

credits

from A History of Sleepwalking, track released November 27, 2007
Music and lyrics by Jana Fisher.
Produced by Jana Fisher.

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Jana Fisher New York, New York

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